Dreams Crushed

The next few posts tell the story of attempting and endurance triathlon.

In 1989 I watched the Ironman World Championship on television. I had never heard of the race. It was spell-bounding. Just watching the average man and woman competing in a race, fighting to just finish was compelling. Their stories of inspiration came in different sizes, ages and abilities. They were so dramatic that I was in tears cheering for them to make it to the finish line. And for those who just missed it, I ached. Winners – who cares, I want to see who finished the race. When they crossed the finish line, I feel like I crossed the line with them.

An Ironman is a triathlon that consists of a 2.4 mile swim, followed by a 112 mile bike ride, followed by a 26.2 mile run (a marathon). 140.6 miles. The final cut off time is usually 17 hours later.

I was inspired! This was the beginning of my attempt to compete in an Ironman. I signed up for shorter sprint triathlons and had a plan to progress. And then as many of you have experienced, life gets in the way of our dreams.

Two painful knees stopped the running and then child number three and four came along and changed my priorities. The dream vanished ….crushed like cheerios in a minivan.

And then it was over ….

Tell the stories of dreams that are crushed. There is always more to the story. It’s your legacy.

Mug or Cup?

Do you want a cup or a mug?

That was the question I often heard when ‘company’ came to our home. That’s another name for friends or family. When company came over the carpet was vacuumed with those triangle designs and coffee was made.

We just put out our Christmas mugs, but I like to reach in the back of the cabinet for a cup. I think they hold the heat better, but there may be another reason I like them.

This morning I used the first cup of the season. As I held it for one last sip, there was no coffee left, but there were the few drops swishing around the bottom. That’s when I thought of my mom.

Growing up, every time I saw a coffee cup it had those few drops at the bottom and there was red lipstick slightly smeared on the edge of the cup. Mom’s trademark.

Your kids or grandkids know your habits and the marks you leave. Make good marks. Have good habits. Tell good stories. Do new things. Still pursue dreams.

You are leaving a legacy a few drops at a time.

Celebrate

Everyone likes to be fussed over. Everyone likes to be celebrated.

We have a family milestone today and three generations will gather to celebrate. We are making this a big deal.

The event and celebration will not cost anything, except for a quick meal afterwards. But the biggest cost will be our presence and enthusiastic cheering. Each of our family sees this as a priority.

Our family tries to celebrate the “wins” and milestones of each other.

Leaving our legacy one celebration at a time.

Two Packs

How do you help others know the healthy changes that your parents have made over the years?

I was visiting some relatives and asked them what they remembered about my mom. They remembered that she smoked two packs of cigarettes a day. I informed them that my mom had given up smoking 35 years ago and that her lungs were clear.

Here’s the point. Unless I told a new story, they would still think she was an active smoker. I had to take the initiative in telling a new story about my mom. Her legacy included making changes in her life for the good.

Helping our parents leave their legacy one story at a time.

Pecans

When I eat roasted pecans, lightly coated in butter and salt, I think of my mom.

During the holidays she would make them for me. I make them now and I think of mom.

My kids and grandkids think the pecans are the best thing they have ever eaten. And then I tell them how mom made them.

Leaving a legacy … one pecan at a time.

Sports and Conversation

There is great value in kids playing sports. There are life lessons regarding preparation, practicing, perseverance, winning and losing.

But there is something else. Sports are an opportunity to connect with your child. You get to be part of their adventure.

Conversations in the car, going to a game and coming home from a game, are your chance for conversation, storytelling and encouragement.

Over time they will remember your words of encouragement, but they will definitely remember that you were there….. and had a chocolate shake on the way home.

You are always Interviewing

‘You are always interviewing’ and ‘Don’t burn any bridges’ have been a few sayings I would speak to my kids when they were younger.

Working hard and building relationships are character qualities for a healthy life. Speak these truths into your children, live them out in your life and tell your personal stories.

Then one day you will hear, “Hey dad, didn’t you always say……”

Speak truth, live it out and leave your legacy.

Conversations

More people are posting pictures of family and friends at Thanksgiving than their food. Why?

… Because our friends and family matter more than the same food everybody else is eating (in the USA) for the day.

The best part of the day for me is the conversations that happen after the meal. Words matter, especially over pecan and buttermilk pie.

Family stories leaving a legacy.

Thankful

We have been designed for community and relationships. When we gather with friends and family, under the banner of thanksgiving, those bonds are strengthened.

I look forward to one of those gatherings today.

Being thankful is best served every day.

Be thankful today. Be thankful tomorrow. Be thankful the next day.

Leave a legacy of thankfulness.